If I may recommend you anything, start listening to 30 Seconds to Mars' "Attack" now... That song is exactly how I feel! "I am finally free!"
Anyways, it's 1-1-11. What a lovely date to begin with... There's something about a date or time with the same numbers to me. Yesterday, obviously, was the last day of the year 2010. Quite a turbulent one for me I can honestly say! Made some decisions that changed my life forever!
I first of all, even though it was very hard, decided to keep holding on to my diet. It made me lose the same amount of weight I lost the year before! I can honestly say I'm very proud of myself!
Also I decided to go to a 30 Seconds to Mars concert all alone and it helped me getting to know some people. They talked to me! That's something I'm not used to, probably because I'm not open for a conversation myself... But not this time, this time it felt like talking to strangers cuz they didn't feel like strangers at all!
This experience made me decide to go to a promo-day in Amsterdam. I met up with those people again and some new faces and I started to tuely like them. We hung out on other occasions and I can now honestly say that I've made some special friends this past year. All because of a band... Crazy! These people I even call my sistahs and they will be a part of my life forever!
Another important decision I made was quitting my nursing job! I hated it! I needed a change desperately and I was gonna make that happen my own damn self! I was done with working extra shifts and not finding ONE single co-worker to help me out at times where I really needed them, like when my grandfather was dead for 2 years and we all wanted to get together with the family to honor him. Or when I had a car accident and I needed someone to change shifts with me, since I didn't have transportation... They even gave me aditude, and I can tell you that that doesn't work with me! Don't try to break me down, cuz I've learned do fight back! Also not being appreciated by those who I help. I feel we can use more appreciation for what we do as nurses! ... All in all, I was done with it and I was glad I came across something completely different! I am, as of today, officially working in a gym! And I like it! Sure, it doesn't pay as much as being a nurse does, but it's not stressful, and I have the Holidays off and most importantly, I don't have to think ahead as much. If I need a sudden day off, I know someone will help me out! Nice co-workers for me from now on ;)
I guess it's safe to say that the decisions I've made in the past year have brought me good things! Things for life, and things for a "peace of mind"!
2011
This year is going to be all about what I want and need. I'll take it as it comes, and if needed, I will change it for the better!
Maybe, dare I say it... Someone special will come along... Not like all the special people I've met last year, but my partner. I honestly don't even know if I want that, but you can't know if you've never tried right?!
I now what's important in life! It's above all health, which we can't always have all control over. It's love, that of family and friends! Spending time with those you care about, and let them know you do sometimes, even though that is pretty damn difficult for me.
I want to finish what I started and I know there's no one who can do that but me! I NEED ME! And we all need love, so I won't run away from that anymore! ;)
"I won't suffer, be broken, get tired, or wasted, surrender to nothing, or give up what I started, and stopped it, from end to beginning, a new day is coming, AND I AM FINALLY FREE!"
And this is how I really feel! ;)
